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How About My Sexuality?

Some people feel closer than ever to their partners and have an increased desire for sexual activity during treatment. Others experience little or no change in their sexual desire and energy level. Still others find that their sexual interest declines because of the physical and emotional stresses of having cancer and getting chemo. These stresses may include:

  • worries about changes in how you look
  • anxiety about health, family, or finances
  • side effects, including fatigue and hormonal changes

A partner's concerns or fears also can affect the sexual relationship. Some may worry that physical intimacy will harm the person who has cancer. Others may fear that they might "catch" the cancer or be affected by the drugs.

You and your partner can clear up many of these misunderstandings by talking about sexual concerns with your doctor, nurse, or a counselor who can give you the information and the reassurance you need.

You and your partner also should try to share your feelings with one another. If it's hard for you to talk to each other about sex or cancer, or both, you may want to talk to a counselor who can help you communicate more openly.

If you were comfortable with and enjoyed sexual relations before starting treatment, chances are you will still find pleasure in physical intimacy during treatment. But you may find that intimacy takes on new meaning. Hugging, touching, holding, and cuddling may become more important, while sexual intercourse may become less important.

For more information, please see our booklets Sexuality and Cancer: For the Woman Who Has Cancer and Her Partner and Sexuality and Cancer: For the Man Who Has Cancer and His Partner.

Last Medical Review: 08/28/2008
Last Revised: 09/11/2008

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