"When you find out you have cancer, you have to get up and just get on with your life."

In August 1997, Rob Parnell had prostate surgery. Two weeks later, catheter still in place and a urine bag strapped to his leg, he was auditioning for a part in Chekov’s The Cherry Orchard.

“I had to play an old man,” Parnell says, “so maybe being so fresh from surgery even helped a little. I got the role, but nobody in the production knew about my prostate until later, a lot later. When you find out you have cancer, you have to get up and just get on with your life.”

Getting on with life has become Parnell’s favorite refrain. When he took early retirement in the 1990s, he promptly turned his long-time hobby, acting, into a second career. Now that his wife has retired, they are moving to St Augustine, Fla., a city both have loved for years.

Early Accidental Diagnosis Lucky

Like many cancer patients, Parnell was diagnosed by accident. A lucky accident, he calls it.

In early 1997, Parnell happened to stop at a diabetes clinic for a free blood test. When the technician recommended that he see a physician because his blood sugar was slightly elevated, Parnell had his first physical exam in years. The physical revealed a slightly elevated PSA level. Without that PSA clue, Parnell said, his physician would not have noticed the small nodule found during a digital rectal exam.

“The worst part is that you think prostate cancer is an old man’s disease,” Parnell says. “And at 63, I didn’t feel old! I didn’t have any urinary problems or any of the other symptoms of prostate trouble.”

Because the nodule was so small, Parnell had plenty of time to investigate prostate cancer before seeing a urologist for the first time. He used the internet for research, and also got information from relatives who work in health care.

“As soon as I heard the possibility from my doctor, I kind of knew it was cancer,” Parnell says. “That first possibility was when the shock hit. By the time I got the formal diagnosis, I was pretty well prepared for what I expected to hear anyway.”

He was also prepared to hear the treatment options. And as far as he was concerned, surgery was the only practical choice. His urologist noted that surgery and radiation have similar five-year survival rates. The difference, Parnell says, is that surgery can be much more precise, especially treating a small tumor. “My wife was with me all the way. From the first moment, it was ‘we’ll do whatever we have to do.’”

Family support has been just as important in the years after his prostatectomy. Like most patients, Parnell had incontinence problems for the first few weeks following surgery. Within months, incontinence had become an occasional drop that leaked when he stood up or lifted something heavy.

Humor and Pragmatism Help Cope

“I notice the leak," Parnell says, "but nobody else does. My wife just laughs and tells me that after five kids, she has a worse problem than I do.”

Parnell credits that pragmatic, get-on-with life attitude with helping him cope with cancer.

“The mind is a powerful force, he says. “You can’t court negative thoughts — I didn’t have time for that and I still don’t. You have to get tested and you have to get treated, but attitude is what really gets us all through.”