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When you first learned you had cancer, you probably thought
mostly of survival. As soon as treatment began, other questions may
have started coming up. How "normal" can my life be, even if my cancer
is under control? How will cancer affect my sex life?
Sex and sexuality are important parts of everyday life. The
difference between sex and sexuality is that sex is thought of as an
activity -- something you do with a partner. Sexuality is more about
the ways people feel, and is linked to your need for caring, closeness,
and touch.
Feelings about sexuality affect our zest for living, our
self-image, and our relationships with others. Yet patients and doctors
often do not talk about the effects of cancer treatment on their sex
lives or how a person may feel as a sexual being. Why? A person may
feel uneasy talking about sex with a professional like a doctor or even
with a close sex partner. It's easy to feel awkward and exposed. Some
may feel as if they have opened up their intimate lives to be looked at
by others. But you can't face your problems until you know what they
are. After that, you can decide whether you want to talk about your
concerns with others.
Here, we offer you and your partner some information about
cancer, sex, and sexuality. We cannot answer every question, but we
will try to give you enough information to help you and your partner
have an honest discussion about your sex life. We will also share some
ideas about talking with your doctor and your cancer care team. We
include a list of other places to get help in the "Additional
resources" section at the end of this document. These are
other good sources of more information.
Keep in mind that sexual touching between you and your partner
is always possible, no matter what kinds of cancer treatment you have
had. This may surprise you, especially if you are feeling down or have
not had sex for awhile. But it is true. The ability to feel pleasure
from touching almost always remains.
The first step is to bring up the topic of your sex life with
your doctor or another member of your health care team. You have a
right to know how your treatment will affect nutrition, pain, and your
ability to return to work. You also have the right to know the facts
about your sex life.
Last Medical Review: 11/10/2008
Last Revised: 11/10/2008
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