- How do you talk to someone who has cancer?
- About cancer
- Hearing the news
- Ways people cope with a cancer diagnosis
- Living with cancer
- Sources of support
- Concern for the family and caregivers
- Help and information
- If your loved one decides to stop getting treatment
- If your loved one refuses cancer treatment
- Facing the final stage of life
- Summing up: Talking to the person with cancer
- To learn more
Living with cancer
Cancer is often a disease that lasts a long time, and people may get treatment for many years. Sometimes, people close to the patient are very involved at first, but grow distant as the treatment goes on over months or even years. It’s understandable that you can become “burned out” when supporting a person with cancer. Still, people with cancer need emotional support through all of the illness.
Remember that encouragement and support can help a person with cancer regain hope, even when they feel beaten down by cancer and/or its treatment. Also, the support of family and friends helps the person with cancer have as normal a life as their illness allows. So, if you’re going to be a support person for someone with cancer, try to hang in there for the long term. Being there and then pulling back can be very painful for the person who needs you, and may even be worse than never being there at all.
It’s often hard to know if you are crossing boundaries or treating the person with cancer too much like a “cancer patient” and not like your friend or family member. Encourage the person with cancer to let you know if you cross this line. Every person with cancer appreciates the friend or family member who remembers that they used to be a person without cancer – that they had, and still have, strengths and weaknesses, interests, and parts of life that have nothing to do with cancer. Sometimes being the person in the “cancer patient’s” life who remembers the whole person is a special gift.
Last Medical Review: 06/09/2014
Last Revised: 02/05/2015